AARON HAGAMAN, MFT
My work centers around helping you be more in touch yourself. How we use ourselves to be close to others, to hold or yield our ground, to push ourselves, or show our emotions—all are expressive, embodied acts. These acts are linked to how we experience ourselves, the beliefs we have, and our identities.
For example, when we are stressed our feeling of stress is not just related to our circumstances, but to the way we respond. We might reflexively brace ourselves or freeze up in challenging moments, feeling afraid or paralyzed as a result. Or we might apply too much pressure and force on ourselves. These embodied acts impact our feeling, thinking and sense of what is possible.
Our rational minds and understandings, while important, are limited at influencing how we feel or behave. Having insight isn't into 'why' we do things isn't enough to change a pattern of action or feeling. I work with people to help them experience how they use themselves so they have more self-influence. We can discover how we inhibit or overwhelm ourselves and change the intensity of our responses, perhaps by being less pressured or braced in the face of uncertainty. We can learn to be closer to ourselves and, in turn, learn to be closer with others. We can receive more of our vitality, potency and presence in the world.
When we lose contact with our bodies we become a victim to our reactions. Alternately, the more you experience how you do things, the more agency you can have. This allows you to translate your experiences into repeatable practices you can take into your daily life. This has practical implications for how we can be agents in our growth, whether it’s how we make demands of ourselves, deal with uncertainty or transition, or express our desires.